I Feel Awful – OH NO!!!!

May 2007

Hi and Welcome to Issue #021 of Success Express!

All of this talk about the Law of Attraction has got me thinking....if every single thought we think either gets us what we want or what we don’t want, that puts us all under a hell of a lot of pressure don’t you think ? Do you beat yourself up for feeling frustrated, angry or sad? We all know how futile THAT is. So what’s the solution? Let’s explore this theory a little further....

We’re not allowed to feel Bad Any More

We live in a society that wants all the answers – we want it now, and we want it in a nice neat little package. On paper, the Law of attraction seems to provide us with all the answers – a blueprint for success, if you like. And the key to a happy, successful life goes something like this: Just think positive thoughts all day every day, and you too can have the car, the house, the million dollar bank account, etc... If you have seen the movie ‘The Secret’, then you'll know what I’m talking about here.

But on the off chance that you haven’t jumped onto the ‘Secret’ bandwagon, I’ll fill you in on the theory in a nutshell; Positive thoughts good. Negative thoughts bad. Negative feelings are the enemy and must be thwarted at all costs. Fair enough?? Well, it’s not quite that simple; when you consider that your conscious mind receives 7 plus or minus 2 thoughts PER SECOND, it’s fair to wonder ‘how are we supposed to monitor everything that comes into our heads?’ Sometimes we don’t even know which specific thought or group if thoughts caused the awful feelings....we just FEEL AWFUL, and that's that.

Let’s not forget that the fact that many of us have a genetic predisposition to depression and as anyone who has suffered from this debilitating illness will tell you, sometimes, it is exhausting and even impossible to apply the principles of the Law of Attraction. The thoughts we experience in depression are not real thoughts; but one thing is for sure....they are very, very negative. So can we safely dismiss the Law Of Attraction principles as a crock of mumbo-jumbo? Well, let's not get ahead of ourselves just yet.

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Here's a secret worth knowing – we ARE Human

Let’s talk about balance. We are supposed to feel things – good and bad. Bad things happen to us to teach us lessons about life, and to give us some point of reference so that when good things happen to us, we will recognise them as good!

At the end of the day, YES thoughts create things... but that doesn’t mean you have to get hung up on trying to monitor every feeling you have and counter each one with a positive thought...that will only make you feel guilty for feeling horrible...and that leads to more feelings of frustration, disillusionment and a lot of grumpiness! So if you find yourself feeling grumpy, be aware of the feelings, but don’t beat yourself up over having them; that will only make things worse.

Personally, I am a great advocate for many Law of Attraction principles and techniques – I’m a big believer in positive visualization for example - but like anything, there’s no need to take it to the extreme. If the Law of Attraction was the be all and end all, then by rights I should be living in a dumpster with nothing but stray cats for company!

I was not born and raised to be a positive person; in fact, certain members of my family used to call me 'super-grump', and I have to say, I’ve had to work very hard to shake myself free of that nickname. Through watching my self-talk and daily meditation, I have achieved some great results – but getting caught up in a tally of my own positive and negative thoughts is just not my idea of progress.

So if you’re feeling bad, sit with it; meditate on it, but don’t fight it. The more you fight the negative feelings, the more they will persist. Instead, embrace the fact that you are human, and that you are able to experience a myriad of emotions, good and bad....remember, ‘this too shall pass’.

Make it easy on yourself....relax and trust that the Universe IS friendly. Claim your share, because if you don't then someone else will!

You’re not Alone

We all have access to a higher power within us; in my own experience, I believe it was this power that allowed me to get to where I am today despite much whining, ranting, raving and pleading.

There are many self-empowerment theories out there that claim their way is the ONLY way to live. Well, that may be so, but in whose world??? Don't believe everything you read! We all have our own perception of the world and we all experience things differently.

So by all means, be open-minded, but recognize that everyone is different – the truth is, many of the theories out there DO have some valid points and offer some great techniques that are designed to get you focusing in the right direction. So, adopt the principles that work for you and leave the rest alone.

Above all, trust in the fact that you are going to be okay. Have faith in your ability to learn and re-learn whatever it is you need to know to move forward in your life….in your own time, and in your own way.

Need some help? A skilled therapist will plant the right seeds and get you attracting what you want in life.

Make a decision today to identify and remove the beliefs that are no longer serving you well.

Don’t forget about Giving

One of the Four Noble Truths in Buddhism is that the cause of suffering is attachment and desire – and this is a valid point. Look, it’s okay to want things – desire is part of human nature. But when you want something so badly that you feel angry, frustrated or depressed when it doesn’t show up in your life at the time you want it, that’s when you have a problem...THAT is when you are attached.

Bottom line? It’s great to want stuff, but if we get too caught up in our ‘lists’ of what we want and our goals towards achieving these things, we forget about one of the most important things – we are all here to give; to contribute to the happiness of others.

Don’t underestimate the power of reaching out and offering love, compassion and kindness to others. When you do this, you take the focus off your own negative emotions, and that in itself is reason enough to do it! If you are positive, truthful and giving, then you will be on the path to true happiness. Now THAT is a theory that’s worth believing in.

Feeling stuck? Consider enlisting the services of a qualified therapist to help you identify your blocks and create new, empowering beliefs.

Would you like a copy of my FREE E-Book? Just click here!

Thinking about hypnotherapy, counselling or life-coaching?Click here to see testimonials from my clients!

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So there you have it! I hope you enjoyed this issue of Success Express...have a great day!

- Sonia

Manifest Your Success

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